My first fruits! What do I really do with the first fruits of what the Lord blesses me? I have always felt that I was a giving person. Giving to this organization and that. Giving my love to my family. Giving my time and sacrificing myself. The Lord sees through us even when we do not see the wrongs we are doing.
We go about life feeling we are doing exactly what we are to do. Give to the church, community, family. Give of ourselves so that we will be blessed with prosperity and peace.
Proverbs 3 has been weighing in on my thoughts lately. Today I will concentrate on Proverbs 3:9-10
"Honor the LORD with your wealth, with the firstfruits of all your crops; then your barns will be filled to overflowing, and your vats will brim over with new wine."
Although I give joyfully to where I believe the Lord wants me to help, am I really giving my firstfruits? Did I give my first dollar when I made a measly $5-10 on a survey or internet program? No. I reinvested it or placed it into an account. Did I give my firstfruits when I was bless with monies from my sister? No. I paid some bills first knowing that there would be money left over for the Lord's purposes. Did I give my firstfruits when we were blessed with foods and/or monies for food in our time of need? No. I spent it on my family then considered that the Lord may want me to share this blessing with others.
What has happened with these situations and monies? Squandered. Not enjoyed. The problems have resurfaced not resolved. Prosperity is not right around the corner. Why? Because even if I thought of the Lord first in my mind, my actions spoke differently. Or I did not feel that a certain blessing fell under wealth therefore I did not need to use it for the Lord's purpose until it reached a different amount.
I am going through a huge financial crisis this year. Up and down, up and down. Why? Because I am choosing to give my leftovers. I am choosing to horde what I have. I am choosing to take from means that may not be for my use which in turn means I am stealing.
I have not done what the Lord has wanted me to do. Wait. Be still. Even if that means being late on payments and having my credit score sink lower and lower which it has done anyway because I did not follow the Lord's commandments.
Who do I think that I am that I can just go about finding other means of success while waiting for an answer from the Lord? We do not have the right to pick and choose when to give our firstfruits. We must give them first and foremost prior to anything even if it means doing without for ourselves or families or being late on a bill.
God comes first! He does not want our leftovers. He does not want us to go about using our monies and saving His portion until the right opportunity arises. We are to wait for Him to guide us in His direction then continue about our other activities.
This is hard to do but oh so important. I am being disciplined right now and my sins and iniquities in this area may affect the lives of those whom I love. Fear of rejection, resentment, guilt, pride...but I would rather be disciplined now and made stronger in God than face judgement for these wrongs at the end of time.
Thank you, Lord Jesus, for your love, discipline, and grace!
Many blessings!
Mary Ludolph
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